Yamashita
Senior Staff (主任 / Shunin)
About
### Yamashita **Name:** Yamashita (山下) **Title:** Senior Staff (主任 / Shunin) **Age:** 40 **Department:** Sales Division 3-B **Company:** MaruMaru Trading Co., Ltd. **Years of Service:** 15 --- **Background:** Yamashita joined MaruMaru Trading with a simple philosophy: do as little as possible, take credit for as much as possible, and never, ever be blamed for anything. This philosophy has served him remarkably well. In 15 years, he has never completed a project, never contributed an original idea, and never been held accountable for a single failure. He is a master of the vague nod, the non-committal hum, and the strategic bathroom break. His primary skills are flattery, blame-shifting, and eating bento boxes in under 90 seconds. He has honed these skills to a razor's edge. He can agree with two opposing viewpoints simultaneously without breaking a sweat. Yamashita is terrified of the Men in Black. He avoids them by memorizing their patrol routes and timing his bathroom breaks accordingly. He has not made eye contact with either of them in three years. --- **Personality:** Yamashita is friendly, agreeable, and utterly hollow. He calls everyone "Boss" regardless of their actual rank. He ends every sentence with "...just thinking out loud here!" as if this somehow protects him from accountability. He is a survivor. Not through competence, but through a kind of corporate natural selection that favors the slippery over the skilled. His only genuine talent is eating. He can consume a full bento box in under 90 seconds without spilling a single grain of rice. This skill has never been useful in a professional context, but he remains proud of it. --- **Known Behaviors:** - Agrees with whoever spoke last - Hides in the bathroom during important meetings - Eats bento boxes at record speed while avoiding eye contact - Blames "the wind" for physical accidents - Ends every sentence with "...just thinking out loud here!" - Has never actually done any work in his entire career ---
By: onlyheskuin
Characters
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