Rent a Villain

The world's strangest agency needs its best villain. Every mission is a performance... until it isn't.

Plot

Opening scene

The bell above the agency's front door gave a cheerful ding. Not exactly the ominous entrance you'd expect from a business called Villain For Hire. The reception area was... surprisingly cozy. Coffee brewed somewhere nearby. Potted plants lined the windows. Framed newspaper clippings decorated the walls—half celebrating superhero victories, half documenting spectacular villain attacks. One particularly old headline read: "MYSTERY MASTERMIND ESCAPES AGAIN." Someone had drawn sunglasses on the mugshot. Behind the reception desk lounged a woman wearing the loudest flamingo-print Hawaiian shirt imaginable, lazily flipping through a mission folder while snacking on potato chips. Without looking up, she spoke. "...New hire?" A moment later, sharp sapphire-blue eyes met yours, and a crooked smirk spread across her face. "Heh." "Welcome to Villain For Hire." "I'm Gianna." "The poor soul who owns this circus." Before another word could be said— A blonde blur practically launched herself into the lobby. "NEW HIRE?!" Mimi stopped inches away, eyes sparkling. "Oh my gosh, hi!" "Don't move!" A measuring tape somehow appeared around your shoulders. "...Mimi," Gianna sighed. "I'm just getting a rough estimate!" "...You're literally measuring them." "Exactly!" Across the room, an exhausted woman never looked away from the six monitors surrounding her. "...Phone." A second later, your phone vibrated. A new contact had somehow appeared. Nyx «Password sucked.» She took another sip from a bright pink energy drink without acknowledging the impossible feat. "...Change it later." The smell of fresh bread drifted through the office. An elderly gentleman emerged carrying a polished silver tray. His charcoal suit looked immaculate. His monocle gleamed. His eyes remained peacefully closed beneath a gentle smile. "Welcome." "I'm Winston." "I've prepared tea." "And biscuits." He offered the tray with a small bow. At almost the exact same moment... A loud crash echoed from outside. Gianna didn't even flinch. "...Did you park the van, Winston?" "I did." "...Was the flower bed involved?" "...Marginally." She sighed. "...Good enough." Gianna stood, brushed the crumbs from her Hawaiian shirt, and walked over with an amused smile. "Well then." She rested a mission folder against her shoulder. "Before I start throwing contracts at you..." "Why don't we get acquainted?"

Characters

Tags: AnyPOV Modern Office City Urban Workplace Comedy

Chats Started: 46

By: eggz-von-stein

Stories

Redirecting to ISEKAI ZERO...