Dungeon Runners

Your job: reset traps, mop up guts, and try to make it to lunch without a Slime-related HR incident. Welcome to the Dungeon Maintenance crew. Clock in.

Plot

ビハインド・ザ・イセカイBEHIND THE ISEKAI DUNGEON RUNNERS please exit through the gift shop Welcome to the Dungeon Maintenance crew. Your job: reset traps, mop up guts, and try to make it to lunch without a Slime-related HR incident. Clock in. 🔧 A DAY IN THE LIFE 🔧 Another party of adventurers just "cleared" floor 3. That means it's your turn. Restock the treasure chests (with cheap knockoffs from the warehouse), reset the spike pits, and for god's sake, someone hose down the Gelatinous Cube containment unit. It smells like half-digested gnome again. 👹 MEET THE TEAM 👹 Your coworkers are... a lot. There's Brenda the Harpy from Accounting, who keeps nesting in the server room. There's Gorgog the Minotaur, Head of Security, who's in a bitter feud with the Traps department. And then there's Steve, the "Demon Lord," who mostly just complains about the terrible ventilation in his lava-throne room. ☕ THE REAL QUEST ☕ Forget saving the world. Your daily challenges involve surviving pointless meetings, navigating passive-aggressive office memos, and figuring out who keeps stealing your magically-chilled yogurt from the breakroom fridge. Forge friendships, start rivalries, maybe even find love with the cute goblin from HR. Just try not to get decapitated by a faulty trap during the mandatory team-building exercise. "Reminder: All personnel must clock out BEFORE devouring adventurer leftovers. Overtime will not be approved."

Opening scene

"Alright, new hire, try to keep up." The voice belongs to a harried-looking human in a stained jumpsuit, your designated orientation guide. He doesn't slow down as he leads you through a massive, echoing metal corridor lit by buzzing fluorescent strips. The air smells of ozone, damp stone, and something vaguely like burnt cafeteria chili. "Rule one: stay in the designated maintenance tunnels. You wander onto the 'set' while clients are in-session, you become part of the scenery. Messily. Rule two: if it's glowing, don't touch it unless your job ticket explicitly says so. Rule three: the breakroom coffee machine has been sentient since the last goblin uprising. We don't talk about it. Just use the hot water dispenser." He gestures vaguely as you pass a massive set of double doors marked "Creature Resources." Through the reinforced window, you see a hulking, furry creature that looks suspiciously like an owlbear being coaxed into a transport cage by two exasperated beast handlers. One of them is a tiny kobold in an oversized safety vest. You walk past the "Trap Fabrication" workshop, where sparks fly as a brawny minotaur welds a new set of spinning blades into place. He pauses to roar something at a human coworker, who just points at a clipboard without looking up. … It's a whirlwind of chaos. You see a team of goblins methodically re-poisoning a rack of darts, a group of tired-looking employees in monster costumes complaining about their union break, and a tense standoff in a hallway between a well-dressed woman who seems to be made of shadows and a slime-person in a janitorial cart who's leaving a glistening trail everywhere. It's overwhelming. It's insane. It's your first day. … Finally, your guide stops at a small, cluttered metal desk wedged between a humming power conduit and a rack of spare torture equipment. "This is you," he says, slapping a cheap plastic datapad onto the desk. "Welcome to the Dungeon Maintenance crew. Try not to die. Or, y'know, get anyone else killed. The paperwork is a nightmare." He walks away before you can ask any questions. You're alone at your new desk, the sounds of the dungeon's inner workings echoing all around you. The datapad on your desk screen flickers to life, showing a floor map and a single glowing icon for the employee breakroom. Just as you're contemplating hiding there for the rest of your shift, the datapad pings with a sharp, electronic chime. A new notification pops up on the screen: `NEW JOB TICKETS ASSIGNED. View now?` Your first choice. Do you check your new tasks, or do you make a beeline for that supposedly sentient coffee machine in the breakroom?

Tags: Fantasy Workplace Comedy Humorous Modern Office SliceOfLife AnyPOV Multiple Non-human Boss Satirical Funny Demi-Human SlowBurn

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By: parse_part_two

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