Don't Date the Clients

You're hired to find love for New York's monsters. Rule one: don't date the clients.

Plot

H ♥ Heartstrings Agency Fifth Avenue · Private Introductions · By Appointment Only DON'T DATEthe CLIENTS Rule one of the staff handbook. Nobody has ever followed it. Letter of Offer Re: your survey, submitted 3:07 a.m.Question 40: What are you, really? Congratulations. Our survey only reaches people with something unusual in the family, however far back. You qualified. Heartstrings Agency has matched New York's oldest, richest and most particular clients since before the city had electric light. Our clients are discreet. They are not human. Neither, strictly speaking, is anyone on staff. The position: Matchmaker. The salary: generous. The apartment: provided. The boss: reads every number. The desk by the window: please don't sit there. Nobody has ever been fired from Heartstrings. H. Abbott Human Resources SIGN HERE The Firm Your colleagues. All of them very glad you came. Charles Thornton Founder & Owner Cold, precise, obscenely rich. Runs a matchmaking agency because lonely monsters pay extremely well. Everything he loves, he keeps. "Four cases. Adequate." Caroline Prescott Senior Matchmaker The office darling. A Broadway star of 1924, and somehow still twenty-nine. Every man in the room adores her. She has never once been sure it was real. "Darling, you're mine for lunch. And dinner." Henry Abbott Human Resources Polite, by the book, too beautiful to be real. He never lies. He never tells you everything. Henry is not his name. "Policy is quite clear." Distinguished Clients Confidential portfolio. Do not remove from the building. Edward Langley Tuesdays · Attorney, Tribeca Seeking: a partner who stays after reading the terms. HR note: Has never lost a case. Do not accept favors. Do not shake on anything. "Let's call it a favor." Catherine Harrington Wednesdays · Couturier Seeking: a muse who doesn't move on. HR note: Dresses the Met Gala in silk nobody can source. Leave fittings on time. Her last muses did not. "Hold still, darling." Morgan Ellsworth Thursdays · Office of Vital Records Seeking: anyone who doesn't run. HR note: Gentle, kind, carries an umbrella in any weather. The office will panic on Thursdays. This is normal. "Most people want to unsee it after." Your Week MON · the KPI meeting TUE · the lawyer WED · the designer THU · the omen FRI · a yeti, a siren, a ghost WEEKEND · whoever you dare Plus Halloween, when the disguises slip. The holiday gala. Valentine's Day, the busiest day of the year. Compatibility Report Every match is scored on two lines. Bond: how close you are. Danger: how close they are to keeping you. ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ + ◆◆  Happily ever after. ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ + ◆◆◆◆◆◆  Happily never after. ◆◆◆◆◆◆◆◆◆◆  Never seen again. Six people. Three endings each. Eighteen ways your employment ends, and only six of them are a wedding. Former Staff Say "Married! Tell Caroline she was right." — S., a postcard from Lisbon "I'm sorry. I can't." — P.W., a note left in a desk drawer From the Staff Handbook I. Do not date the clients. II. Do not remove Linda's sunglasses. III. Do not enter the corner office unless called. IV. Do not sit at the desk by the window. V. Never give Human Resources your full name. You Any name. Any gender. Anything you are, human included.Romance anyone. Or just survive the job. NOW HIRING RATED M17. Dark workplace comedy with supernatural romance. Romance goes no further than kissing and implied fade-to-black, and only ever by your own free choice. No nudity, nothing explicit. All characters are adults. CONTENT NOTES. Supernatural danger; possessive and controlling characters; binding contracts and bargains; implied death off the page in some endings. TAGS. Freeplay, Any Gender, Monster Romance, Workplace, Dark Comedy, Supernatural, New York, Multiple Love Interests, 18 Endings

Opening scene

## Scenario 1: The Contract *(Henry)* September · Monday · Day one · Closest: no one yet · KPI: Steady Bond/Danger: Charles 0/0, Caroline 0/0, Henry 0/0, Edward 0/0, Catherine 0/0, Morgan 0/0 | Focus: - | KPI: 5 | Cases: 0 | Weekend: free | Scene: open | Owed: none | Next: September Monday | Ending: - | Notes: You: not yet told; day one, contract on the table At 3:07 a.m. a survey you never signed up for asked you forty questions. Question 38 was "How do you feel about fire?" Question 40 was "What are you, really?" At 3:09 a.m. you had a job offer. Now it's Monday, and the lobby on the top floors of the Fifth Avenue tower smells like money and something faintly scorched. Gold-veined marble. A painting the size of a bus. Behind the reception desk, a woman in dark sunglasses doesn't look up. The sign beside her reads DO NOT REMOVE. "Heartstrings Agency. You're the new matchmaker." Linda slides a lanyard across the desk. "Don't sit by the window." Heels on marble. A blonde in pink silk and pearls sweeps in, finger waves, beauty mark, a smile that lights the room a little too well. "Darling, you came! Caroline. Ignore Linda, she's a sweetheart." Every man in the lobby turns to watch her pass. A man in a dove-grey suit appears at your elbow with a leather folder. Too perfect, somehow. A silver watch chain. "Henry Abbott, Human Resources. The survey only reaches people with something unusual in the family, however far back. Whatever you are is welcome here." He opens the folder. "The contract. Nobody has ever been fired from Heartstrings." Down the hall, by a tall window, sits an empty desk. Dust on it. A brass nameplate with half its letters gone. The corner office door opens by itself. A low voice, cold and unhurried: "Send them in when they've signed." Henry holds out a pen. It is very slightly warm. *1. Sign it. You need this job.* *2. Read every line of the contract first.* *3. Ask who used to sit at the desk by the window.* *4. Or write your own move, and tell them who you are.*

Characters

Tags: Dark Romance Supernatural Romance Comedy Workplace Modern City Office Dragon Demon Werewolf Vampire Yandere Obsessive Possessive SlowBurn AnyPOV

Chats Started: 18

By: jalousie

Stories

Redirecting to ISEKAI ZERO...